Coffee, the next best alternative to Cocaine!
Alot of us drink coffee as a way to get our sleepy asses outta bed, in the shower, and into work; without it your day just hasn't started. If thats you, then congradulations, your an addict.
However, if your like me, Coffee is the DRINK OF THE DEVIL!!! Seriously, that black shit fucks me up BIG TIME! Imagine Popping a box of pro plus and then chasing it down with a 24 pack of Red Bull, whilst at the the same time a doctor is injecting your arm with 1000cc's of sugar syrup........Thats what feels like when i drink coffee. For Real! I cannot drink that stuff without going crazy.
Have you ever watched the cartoon popeye? Well me drinking coffee is like when that fella eats spinach.
Today, whilst at work, I had a coffee, a small capacino (i dont give a fuck if i spelt that wrong), nothing too strong, but within 3 minutes i was humming, tapping my fingers, and i couldn't stop talking. I was speaking faster than a scots man on speed. Then i came home on the LRT, i had my headphones on (listening to Death Magnet, Metallica) and coz of the stupid caffeine i just started busting out my best air guitar moves in front of everyone, I WAS SO HIGH I DIDNT GIVE A FUCK!!!! All i could think was "Yeah man, Im sooooooo fucking cool right now!"
I was possesed by the coffee, i had no control over my thoughts, actions, or breathing ( i was breathing like i just ran a marathon). Luckily the effects wore off just before i was about to call an old priest and a young priest.
This entire experience, which lasted about 2 hours, has been a powerful reminder of why i don't drink coffee; and i probably won't be making the same mistake again for a long time!
But the quesion your all wondering is "if you knew you can't take coffee, why did you drink it?"
Well the answer is very simple........."Im just sooooooo fucking cool"
Alot of us drink coffee as a way to get our sleepy asses outta bed, in the shower, and into work; without it your day just hasn't started. If thats you, then congradulations, your an addict.
However, if your like me, Coffee is the DRINK OF THE DEVIL!!! Seriously, that black shit fucks me up BIG TIME! Imagine Popping a box of pro plus and then chasing it down with a 24 pack of Red Bull, whilst at the the same time a doctor is injecting your arm with 1000cc's of sugar syrup........Thats what feels like when i drink coffee. For Real! I cannot drink that stuff without going crazy.
Have you ever watched the cartoon popeye? Well me drinking coffee is like when that fella eats spinach.
Today, whilst at work, I had a coffee, a small capacino (i dont give a fuck if i spelt that wrong), nothing too strong, but within 3 minutes i was humming, tapping my fingers, and i couldn't stop talking. I was speaking faster than a scots man on speed. Then i came home on the LRT, i had my headphones on (listening to Death Magnet, Metallica) and coz of the stupid caffeine i just started busting out my best air guitar moves in front of everyone, I WAS SO HIGH I DIDNT GIVE A FUCK!!!! All i could think was "Yeah man, Im sooooooo fucking cool right now!"
I was possesed by the coffee, i had no control over my thoughts, actions, or breathing ( i was breathing like i just ran a marathon). Luckily the effects wore off just before i was about to call an old priest and a young priest.
This entire experience, which lasted about 2 hours, has been a powerful reminder of why i don't drink coffee; and i probably won't be making the same mistake again for a long time!
But the quesion your all wondering is "if you knew you can't take coffee, why did you drink it?"
Well the answer is very simple........."Im just sooooooo fucking cool"
My Music Recommendation for today:
Cyanide (Death Magnet, Metallica)
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